Learning to love my pregnancy body

Learning to love my pregnancy body has been something I’ve been working at basically every day of my pregnancy.

For the most part, it’s been quite easy. I already had stretch marks on my belly, so haven’t really noticed the additional few that have appeared so far. The growing bump doesn’t bother me either. The feeling of my little baby kicking around in there is worth every inch of growth. I haven’t dealt with any kind of hormonal acne, varicose veins or any of the other common symptoms people have spoken to me about.

To be honest, the worst thing I dealt with was greasy hair from week 6-10, which I managed to solve by investing in a good shampoo and carrying a can of dry shampoo around with me.

So why has learning to love my pregnancy been a struggle?

For me, it’s been the smaller things. Things that no one else probably notices, but I have noticed. And I’ve found them tough to battle.

Learning to love my pregnancy body…and the hair growth

Everyone talks about your hair growing long and lush during pregnancy. Personally, I don’t think I’ve experienced this – on my head, anyway. Under my arms and down below? A whole other story.

I shave, the hair is back almost instantly. I wouldn’t mind if it wasn’t such a chore to shave. Particularly down there when I now have a bump in the way. My boyfriend, bless his heart, has offered to help – but how unsexy does that make a girl feel?!

Body hair doesn’t bother me – usually. But when I’ve literally just shaved, the annoyance of raising my arms and seeing dark little spikes does my head in. Maybe it’s hormones, but whatever it is, it gets to me. I hate having all this hair that I usually trim away. I loathe the additional effort of having to shave more regularly.

And can we talk about the two stray hairs that have sprouted under my chin, needing to be tweezered out on a regular basis? That doesn’t make me feel sexy or attractive in any kind of way.

Sure, it’s no big deal to tweezer out two singular hairs tucked away where my neck joins my head. No one can see them, they’re blonde. Realistically, I know they’re no biggie.

Pregnant me has other feelings. She hates them, they make her feel unattractive and gross, to put it plainly.

Hair growth happening everywhere except on my head has definitely made learning to love my pregnancy body tough.

Learning to love my pregnancy body… and the double chins

I’ve always had a round face, chubby cheeks. It’s never really been an issue, until my double chin became more prominent (to me, anyway) during pregnancy.

My boyfriend says it’s in my head and that I look beautiful. I’m glad he feels that way, because I don’t!

I see the photos being taken of me each week to keep a record of my growing bump, and the first thing I notice in every photo is my chins. Plural.

I then zoom in, further picking apart issues with my face as a whole – I have a squinty eye, look at those eye bags, again, the chin. I pick and pick and pick until I’ve decided I hate the photo and can’t possibly post it. My boyfriend suffers in silence as he takes 50+ photos, only for me to go through them all and select the very first one he took.

Non-pregnant me knows this is stupid. I am better than this, and I would tell off anyone else I saw doing this. I would encourage them to see the beauty in themselves and post allllll the photos.

Pregnant me? Nope, she’s not listening to that advice. She wants to pick and pick and pick unless she feels she looks absolutely flawless. Brilliant.

Learning to love my pregnancy body… and the lack of clothes

Nothing. Fits. Me.

Every day I sit in front of my wardrobe, battling with myself and my clothes, trying to find an outfit that isn’t leggings and a baggy jumper – seemingly the only attire suitable for a person with a growing bump.

Over the last couple of years, I’ve really fallen in love with fashion and clothes. I love experimenting with my style. Now, pregnancy is making this extremely difficult. Learning to love my pregnancy body has definitely been hindered by the fact I’ve been living in shapeless, baggy clothes that I don’t really love. They stop me feeling like me! Of course, that ends up having a detrimental effect on how I feel about myself.

The battle with clothes lasted until 22 weeks and then I said “no more”. A lot of maternity gear is gross and outdated. I’ve also found that normal clothes fit better, just size up. So I did a little haul of some different items, found a style that works, and now I seem to be happier when getting dressed. Now, I feel like I’m still able to reflect my true self through my style – sassy, sexy and fabulous!

(It’s all about the bodycons, gals.)

Learning to love my…leaking boobs

Mmmmm. Everyone loves a leaky boob, am I right?

Waking up with your nipple glued to the sheet, or covered in colostrum crust is so unattractive. Well, so pregnant me thinks anyway. Normal me would laugh it off, and in the back of my mind I’m celebrating that already my boobs are starting the milk making process. I know this is a big deal, it’s important and it’s good. Some women will want to punch me in the face for complaining. Others might relate.

It just doesn’t make me feel sexy. Or attractive. At all.

Learning to love my pregnancy body is about dealing with leaky boobs. This is something I’ve come to accept… even if I don’t want to.

Learning to love my…Swollen ankles (and everything else!)

Okay, but why. WHY do my ankles have to swell?

I knew this was coming. Pregnant me knew this was coming. Has that made the battle to accept things ballooning up any easier?

Of course it hasn’t.

To be honest, I’m only in the early, early days of swelling too! My ankles are a tiny bit puffy. It’s only going to get worse! I’ve been told I’ll only be able to wear ugly shoes! It’s a disaster. And it all only makes learning to love my pregnancy body that bit harder.

But it’s not all bad really

I love my growing bump, and feeling baby kicking around. I love my glowing skin, I love my bigger boobs (who doesn’t love big boobs?!), I love my fuller lips, I love how my hormones have made me feel about my boyfriend, my boosted sex drive, my ability to sleep for hours and hours whereas I struggled before.

Also, I love knowing that my body is doing something I never believed it could. It’s growing an actual human being. I’ve made life. It’s so incredible and I still can’t quite get my head around it.

Self love is never easy. Ever. I always say about how it’s something you have to work at every day. It takes practice, and it’s never a linear process either. So learning to love yourself when your body is changing virtually every single day is obviously going to be a challenge.

You are more than your body, which is another message I always preach. You deserve to love yourself beyond the realms of your physical appearance. And knowing that is what helps me when I’m learning to love my pregnancy body. Because I know that I am still worthy of loving myself, no matter what I look like. Even with leaky boobs and chin hairs and a double chin. I deserve to love myself.

You deserve to love yourself too.

Love from, Florence Grace